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Long pauses make long entries... - Casa de la AL

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October 4th, 2007

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08:09 pm - Long pauses make long entries...
It's been a good few months since I posted here last. I really wish I could -- and would -- post here more. I guess I've just moved on from the random ramblings of college and feel like I don't have as much to say...or the problem is, I guess I just don't want to publish all the things that I'm thinking about. Like they're deep thoughts or something. Heh. But mostly I guess I figure I don't have any readers anymore, so who even cares if I post to it?

I'm quite busy lately, working at the school and with The Marching Band, and I had to quit Curves because it just wasn't working on my schedule. I quit working out there, too, and moved on to another gym. (More on that later). I've been feeling fairly introspective lately, especially on the people and job front. (But of course, what other huge things are there to focus on in life but people and your job?) I'm only 25, yet I feel like life has some sort of finish line I have to be constantly working towards, keep going, hurry up, pick up the pace. I read the journals of several different people that I don't even know, regular blogs and weight loss blogs and blogs of all kinds, and so many of these people have picked up and moved their life from one coast of the country to another, shifted cities and states and countries, only to pick up and move again a few years later...and it just gets me thinking. Why do I feel like if I move geographically from where I am and decide it's not precisely where I am supposed to be, it'd be like playing Sorry and being bumped back ten squares? I mean, I haven't had a consistent job in three years, what's the difference between doing that here in Ohio or doing it somewhere else? I don't know. I feel like I'm stuck in my safety net, unwilling to move more than a few feet from where I am for fear of....of...

Well, maybe that's the problem. I don't really know what it is I'm afraid of. Messing up? Being wrong? hard work? Mediocrity? Strangers with candy?

I really just need to shake things up a little and get some changes in my life. The problem is, I'm just not exactly sure how to start the shaking, or where to shake it on over to.

Speaking of shaking, I started at my new gym last Monday, and it's GLORIOUS. The owner leads a class that meets every Monday night where she teaches a new circuit workout, and we go back in two more days that week to repeat it. Combining that with my running has made me feel fabulous (even though this week has been extraordinarily mediocre in the workout department because of band business keeping me tied up all weekend, but we're not talking about that right now, are we?) Even though I've only seen small weight-loss benefits, I feel so much prouder of myself and so much stronger. I feel accomplished when I'm done, and fricking TIRED, which wasn't happening anymore for me at Curves. I needed something that would challenge me when I attempted it, because I was getting too lazy to push myself hard there. There's no possible way I can be lazy lifting here, unless I refuse to do the amount of reps that are expected, and....yeah. I'm definitely doing all the reps. Don't worry. :)

In other fitness goals, the 28th of October is the 5k that I'm going to run. A few weeks ago I completed the course in 35 minutes. My goal is to get that under 30 minutes by the time the race rolls around in three weeks. Provided that not being able to run for 4 days doesn't put me totally off schedule, I'm figuring that's a feasable goal. I'm....just...not quite sure how to accomplish it. But I figure that at least if I keep plugging away at it, keep completing the 3.1 miles and trying to run even farther, then I can make it easier on myself when it's actually race time. I'm just really excited to have gone fitness-wise from where I was to where I am now, and keeping this in mind is really helping me when I'm feeling upset about not having reached my weight goal yet. (Yes, we're still working on getting 30 pounds down from here.)

Alright. Time to go pack for this weekend's band trip and head to bed.
Current Mood: pensivepensive

(2 comments | Leave a comment)


[User Picture]
Date:November 23rd, 2007 06:38 am (UTC)
I can't believe I never commented on this. I always try to say something when you write, since it's such a rare treat. =)

How ya doing with your goals? How's life since this entry?
[User Picture]
Date:January 6th, 2008 06:24 pm (UTC)
I also can't believe I missed this entry.

Al, I wish we lived closer together. It's been a struggle trying to gather the courage up to join a gym. I found one close to home that I really want to try, but I don't want to go alone. (Isn't that pathetic?) Anyways, I hope your 5k went well. I tried to do couch 2 5k but I wasn't so hot at it. I may try it again once the weather gets nicer outside. :)

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